Using Your Grimoire of Self … Or Any Other Journal For That Matter

An Exercise To Get You Started

No Matter Where You Are

What happens first?

You sit down and you ask:

What do I want?

What do I need?

Which way do I go?

Where do I want to get to in the end?

How do I get there?

Maybe you already know the answers to these questions — or at least have some sort of idea.

So you make a list.

I want: xyz.

I need: xyz.

I want to go: here.

I will take these steps (xyz) to get to that place.

Awesome. Great. Now — get going.

I will be your biggest cheerleader the whole way…

But —

What about the rest of us?

The ones with no ideas?

The ones with too many ideas?

What do we do?

We sit with pen and paper and we write.

We journal about how we don’t know.

We journal asking for help — about asking for help from others.

We journal asking, asking, for, needing, wanting, a sign — any sign — someone please help…

We take notebooks and glue in pictures cut from magazines or printed out from our computers. Sometimes we know why we choose certain images. Sometimes we do not.

We doodle and draw — on those collaged images, around those images, on completely different pages.

We add random spots of color using paints or markers or decorative tapes. We use stamps and stencils. We add random marks that appeal to us. Maybe we even throw on some glitter, just a touch, for the magic of it.

Sometimes we add words. A single word, maybe two. Perhaps a quote. Maybe the mood strikes and we write in blocks of text on our pages. Maybe we write, creating designs with our words, our letters. Maybe we make it pretty. Maybe we don’t.

Our subconscious is working.

The Universe is working.

We are stuck in our own stuff, locked into our own tunnel vision, feeling lost, hopeless, confused.

What do we do?

We ask for help —

Then we step back

And allow the answers

To filter in —

We allow the answers,

The suggestions,

To come to us,

To seek us out,

To show us the way.

We stop assuming.

We listen.

We watch.

We absorb.

Email themes begin to show up

(as in, themes show up in your inbox)…

The same themes,

Again and again…

Ditto with whatever resources you usually have on hand or that enter your realm of influence regularly:

Newsletters

Newspapers

Blog posts

Magazines

Billboards

Television shows

Movies

Commercials

Songs on the radio

And on and on and on…

Images repeat themselves.

Phrases come up again and again —

In random conversations,

Overheard,

Ones you have…

You may even find yourself

Repeating the same things

Over and over…

Hear these messages.

Write them down, as they arrive, as you recognize them…

Draw them.

Collage them.

Whatever it takes.

Put them in your notebook,

In your journal,

Wherever you put things to keep them safe.

Then —

Explore them…

Each theme,

Word,

Image,

Idea…

Explore them —

Each as a single individual…

You journal about them,

One at a time.

How does x make you feel?

What does x mean to you?

How can you bring x into your life?

How can you embody x?

How can you make x work for you?

Do you feel resistance to x?

How does it show up?

In your life?

In your body?

Work with it.

Resistance is ok.

Work on through it.

Not push through it —

Not push past it —

Not ignore it —

Work through it.

Return to your journal with your resistance.

Write.

Draw.

Collage.

What are you resisting?

What are you afraid of?

Come back to these questions,

Until you are clear

About them…

Then…

Ask yourself:

What is the worst that can happen?

What is the worst thing that could happen if I ________________?

If I take this step —

If I voice this opinion —

If I open this door —

If I embrace this action —

If I start this activity —

If I embrace this emotion —

If I do this work —

If I read from this book —

And so on —

And so on —

Whatever it is for your unique

Situation and

Experience.

If you are afraid to ask the questions —

If you are afraid to hear the answers —

Don’t worry.

All you’ve done so far is write some stuff down —

Or collect some images in a book.

The book can be thrown away —

Shredded —

Burnt…

It’s just paper and ink for the most part.

If you are overwhelmed by

What you find —

Where you go —

What you want —

That is fine.

You do not have to be

Ready

To do anything

At all

Until you are genuinely

Ready.

Maybe, what you need

Instead of

Action steps

Is the permission

To let go

Of everything you discovered.

Maybe what you need

Is to allow

What you’ve learned

Time

To incubate,

To coalesce,

To come together,

To germinate.

Maybe you need to simply

Step back

And allow

Your ideas

Time

To ruminate —

To percolate…

This too is fine.

Maybe you need

A few days…

Or weeks…

Or months…

Or even years…

For your ideas to

Hibernate

Before you can

Embrace them

And make them

Your own.

I give you permission

To take all the time

That you need to take.

I’ll be here to cheer you on

When you are ready

To take

That next step.